When a local delicacy is garnished to look like a spaghetti vingrannette, local folks may grow hesitant to take a bite due to the precariousness of the taste. But what happened to the “yɛrekɔbisa abrewa” (we are going to ask the old sage) days? I guess it was all in pursuit of what we did not understand. If I had my way, I would campaign that uncertainties should not deprive us from new discoveries. After all, the sweetness of the pudding lies in the eating.

Culture wise, a quintessential Ghanaian man is likely to gain a captains’ armband as a real man when he keeps his problems to himself. The seniority of it is when at the highest intensity he manages to pace up and down without showing any sign of being weighed down. The worse of this is the aftermath of the Beijing Women’s Conference, which has incited women to rub shoulders with men as fellow counterparts. Women, nowadays, also want a share of the armband or set out to compete with their own version.

However, in our quest to uphold an ancient legacy, we should not forget that it is the same inhabitants of the ancient times who found wisdom in the saying, “hu m’ani so ma me nti na atwe mmienu nam” (meaning the urgency to clear a peck in the eye has made antelopes move in pairs). Apparently, no matter how a person would want to keep to himself/herself, there is always a bosom friend he/she shares egg from the same shell with. The Asante’s call it, “nadamfo a ɔne no bɔ kosua tafere”.

I have no shred of doubt that you would acquiesce that the preceding paragraph defeats the belief that keeping your problems to yourself makes you a hero or to be adjudged as ‘well composed’. One way or the other, it becomes necessary to share.

But who do you share with?
Not to be in a haste to point a finger at who to share with, let us remind ourselves with the sayings of the sages of the old times which go like, “suro nipa na gyae saman” (fear humans rather than to fear ghost) and “sɛ aboa bi bɛka wo a, na efiri wo ntoma mu” (the insect that will bite you would be from your cloth). These sayings also make sharing with a bosom friend not 100% appropriate, right? Well, it could always go for a starter, notwithstanding.

Who then is it 100% appropriate to share with?
I will confidently say, the office of the psychologist or the counsellor. The psychologist/counsellor is the one who by virtue of the ethics guiding his profession makes it binding unto himself to keep what you share as safe as baby’s sigh. Thus, the paramount nature of confidentiality has created a form of a lock that prevents what you share from eluding.
But the proposed Psychologist or Counsellor is a total Stranger, not even an acquaintance to begin with.

Of course yes, no two ways about that. However, the psychologist/counsellor who seeks to assist you to quash your problems or come to terms with your conflicts, employs professional, effective approach and techniques that could be akin to a magic wand.
At your first meeting with a psychologist/counsellor, his/her reception has the tendency to wipe off 5% of your problems. His/her smiles and professional gestures that would be laced through the entire session can also take away 10% of your worries. At this point you would begin to feel that your load is getting lighter. Your own excitement after this realization can also subtract 15%.

Now you will feel no need to keep part but unleash all. The psychologist/counsellor’s patience to listen with no stains of judgment or condemnation could lift 50% load off your shoulders. You would now have the space to heave a deep sigh; my cup of worries is almost empty! At this juncture, the psychologist’ approach and techniques employed to discuss the case presented has the efficacy of clearing the remaining 20%. I believe you now know why the psychologist/counsellor is the 100% appropriate person to share your problems with.

To conclude, let me add that, we should not hesitate to explore the fortunes that the psychologist/the counsellor bears. No form of uncertainty should deprive us from discovering the relief in the office of the psychologist. No problem is unsurmountable. Worries do not add a block to a construction. Do not wait till your situation beckons you to tie the rope or swallow the pills.
Let us walk to the office of the psychologist/counsellor earlier, and I can bet on my psychology degree, we will come out refreshed and grateful.



Kwabena Sarfo-Kantanka, Kobby is a great Psychologist with an in-depth knowledge about human nature.
He loves writing engaging articles on education, human nature and behaviour. He is committed to writing motivational articles.

Email: kobby@oxelle.com

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